Far too often we are so busy hiding in fear that we cannot chase our dreams (yes– I’ve said this before). What is one of the biggest fears we collectively have? Others.
We fear what people will think of us.
We fear if what we do will make others happy.
We fear what will happen if we ‘stray from the norm’.
Honestly, I teeter on the edge of saying we fear each other.
Can you tell me the last time you did something for yourself? Can you tell me the last day you didn’t wonder what someone thought about you or something you did? Can you tell me the last time you didn’t do something because you were scared of what someone would think? Can you tell me the last time you said ‘fuck you’ to the world and didn’t allow others to influence your thoughts and decisions?
Being a college student, I am immersed in this behavior. Every day, every hour, I am surrounded by the worry of satisfying others; the self-questioning, the self comprise.
To put it in as few words as possible, I see people living for someone else.
Putting aside the severe pressure of society to follow a stigmatized norm, I think there is an intense fear of coming off as selfish, and honestly I’m tired of it. It’s sad and it is killing our generation.
It is also a misconception: do you know what the definition of selfish is?
Selfish; lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one’s own personal profit or pleasure.
Being completely and utterly wrapped up in yourself to a point where you are inconsiderate of others– that is selfish.
Deciding you don’t want to go to an event because you aren’t feeling it, that isn’t selfish. You are allowed to enjoy different things.
Spending your time differently than those around you, that isn’t selfish. Your happiness is what matters most.
Not being able to be there for everyone’s dilemmas all of the time, that isn’t selfish. You need to take care of yourself first.
Being or not being friends with someone your other friends aren’t/are, that isn’t selfish. You choose what/who is apart of your life.
Getting rid of something negative in your life despite any outside influence that may be present, that isn’t selfish. You deserve more than negativity.
Taking time for yourself, that isn’t selfish. It’s your life.
Deciding to stop being the sounding board for everyone else’s problems, that isn’t selfish. It’s not fair to you, you deserve more.
Not following the ‘social norm’, that isn’t selfish. We need more of that in this world.
Saying ‘screw this’ and completely uprooting to put yourself and your happiness first, that isn’t selfish. This is your life, nobody else’s.
Following your dreams, even if they don’t line up with those around you perfectly, that isn’t selfish.
That is self loving.
That is what you were put here to do.
You have one life to live.
The question is, will you make it the one you want?
You are the sole person in control.
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