My first crop top: the ultimate self esteem test

This is me – purchasing my first crop top. Or at least, the first crop top I actually intended to wear. This was the crop top that spiralled into the ownership of multiple crop tops!

We all know that crop tops have long since been the “trend”. In fact, I’m pretty sure Limited Too (remember that place?) was rolling them out since I was about 12. I’m not into keeping up with Vogue’s 2015 style guide but I am into keeping up with loving myself. I’ll tell you why…

This (the picture on the left) was taken earlier this year. This (the crop top) was never about the trend and always about the fact that I would never have ever thought to wear one. I would never have ever pegged myself as a midriff showing type-a-gal. It’s not that I didn’t like the look of a crop top… I straight up didn’t have the confidence to rock it, no matter how my body looked.

My stomach has always been the part of my body that I criticize; that I think negatively about. Despite the fact that our stomachs are one of our bodies’ most powerful regions: our core supports our back, our stomach houses and digests the fuel we put in our bodies – AKA food – and it does lots of other cool stuff I’m sure a doctor could tell you about…

By the end of the winter, I was ready for the summer and wanted to push myself to do something out of my comfort zone. I had spent hours in the gym fighting seasonal depression, hoping that the endorphins would keep me happy! And sure enough, I stayed happy and fit – which solidified my desire to stay active for reasons outside of my appearance. The point is, that after lots of hard work building physical and mental strength, I bought one…a crop top. And the best part? I absolutely loved wearing it.

Why did I love it so much? I was unapologetically being me. I was not thinking what people would think of me and I was not thinking negatively of myself. I was no longer hiding the parts of my body that I thought I didn’t like. I was starting to show myself, all of myself, and show that I love myself. I was proving, that I love myself to myself. I was proving my worth by doing more outside of my comfort zone.

I want you to feel all of these amazing things. To feel like you’ve won, because the battles we fight within ourselves are often the hardest. And, you can win those battles. No question about it. I promise.

Slipping on a crop top for me was not at all related to the way that I looked but the way that I started looking at myself. It’s hard not to get caught up in our appearance because everything around us tells us that it matters what we look like. It’s also hard for us fitness enthusiasts not to focus strictly on the physical “gains” but to really celebrate our emotional and mental achievements – overcoming what was once hard for us inside.

So, today, I dare you to put on a crop top.

And I also dare you to feel incredibly sexy in it because you deserve it and you are.